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3 Ways to Master Unsolicited Advice

We are by default opinionated people.

By our nature and makeup, we are always observing and sensing the world around us to make decisions out of mere need to survive.

That is how we have survived the times of hunting and gathering of old, the weather changes of the Earth and the beast of animals and neighboring groups.

But today, our observations and making sense of the mysteries of life, lend people the need to air them out. With social media, traditional media outlets and land of free speech, people have many opportunities to express themselves.

But what do you when people want to impose their opinions and facts through their lens on you?

How do you handle the unsolicited advice?

Here are 3 things to keep in mind when receiving unsolicited advice:

Audit the Audience

Sometimes people can offer opinions about what you are doing in what they see maybe in your best interest.

Ask yourself:

  • Are these opinions (practices) they put in place?

  • Are they someone you see by their own life have outcomes that you are looking to achieve?

  • Are they coming from a tone and space balanced, objective and non bipartisan persona or are they uncontrolled, aggressive and placing a sense of press of their perspectives?

  • Are they open to your response and dialogue or are they shutting you down for the space to offer your perspectives?

It always important to audit the audience from which unsolicited advice is coming from.

You can quickly assess whether they are coming from concern that you can glean from and apply or the need to control you with meaning well perspectives in hopes they can influence your thinking.

Most times, these come from meaning well people such as relatives or friends who want nothing but the best for you but may be projecting their own internal issues onto you so always discern your audience.

Pay Attention to Your Emotions

To matter what the world around is doing or not doing, happiness is about an inner resolve.

That means that you cannot allow your happiness nor your inner peace be moved by others intent to tell you what is best for you and what you ought to be doing or not doing.

If you find yourself getting upset or flustered and/or even in doubt because what others may to try to lend to you unwarranted, it is time to get back to the center of you.

Center yourself and build the inner confidence knowing that anyone who did anything faced some opposing force whether it be implicit or explicit.

And true it is those implicit notions that can be hard to detect which usually come through those closest to us which we expect should be the most understanding, but that is not always the case in embracing possibilities.

Take time when these moments of unsolicited advice arise (usually unexpectedly), check in with your emotions.

Ask yourself:

Was there anything that they said they made me doubt, deter my enthusiasm or confidence in my abilities?

If so, be present with those triggers and stand up to them with a positive mental attitude response and with a verbal affirmation that counters and aligns to your goals, plans and dreams such as:

“I understand that I and only I need the confidence and resolve to achieve my goals. And as I remain steadfast in my goals, the right people, the right circumstances and the right possibilities occur for me no matter what says, do, not say or not do.”

Respond with Poise

Sometimes the best thing to do when you received an solicited advice is simply say, “Thank You.”

  • You don’t have to validate your position.

  • You don’t have set up a legal case for your dreams as if you are standing before a grand jury.

  • You don’t have to win anyone over.

Just keep being you and keep embracing possibilities!


Most people truly mean well and in their own way sometimes giving you advice from their lens is a way to share their love and care for you.

That doesn’t mean it means well for you and that doesn’t mean you have snap off and create more dissonance by blowing your top off at every opposing opinion of you.

When you rest in possibilities, you rest in your inner resolve not the resolve of others.

Let go of the fear of criticisms, the definite approval of others and the need to justify your aspirations.

When you master how to deal with unsolicited advice, you embrace possibilities!


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