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Dealing with Rejection

Updated: Apr 30, 2019

Everyone has some level at which they want to be accepted and validated (refer to the article, "Validation 101"). This internal desire for acceptance becomes extensions of ourselves in all that encompasses who we are such as:

1. Our Families

2. Our Line of Work

3. Our Lifestyle

More specifically, when we share that new vision, the latest idea, the first business venture or a freshly launched product, we look for acceptance only to find some level of disappointment:

1. Only 30 followers, when you invited 500 people.

2. Your friends declined your recent webinar invite or haven't responded at all.

3. All of your warmest leads fell to do business or haven't responded at all.

This has nothing do about acceptance; yet, rejection. That nine letter word can make anyone cringe. It is analogous to the words, "No," "Denied," or "Unapproved." As a result, rejection has gotten a bad reputation, especially in business.

But here are some key insights about rejection and dealing with rejection:

1. Denial is a function of life.

We all face rejection where we are on the receiving end or dishing it out: nothing to take personal, nothing to internalize. None of us say yes to everything. That's merely the fact of economics and opportunity costs; thus, we reject most things. The last time you went out to eat, you said, "Yes," to one restaurant, rejecting up to hundreds maybe even thousands of other restaurant choices.

2. Rejection opens up an opportunity for clarity.

Some of the best, "No's," opens the window for a better, "Yes." Denial can bring about deeper awareness to learn about areas of needed growth and development or clarity for a new path that can lead to more, "Yes's."

So maybe rejection could be the best thing that ever happened to you?

Maybe the job said no because couldn't pay what you're worth and knew you'd get bored quickly leaving the company faster than you came?

Maybe you were denied the loan because you needed to improve your financials and learn how to present numbers in your favor for a better interest rate?

Maybe you didn’t get into the top culinary school, but the senior sous chef in the has an apprentice program?

Last Caveat: Sometimes (well most times) your "Support System," your biggest cheerleaders are not (always) your customer.

There is a difference.

Your mom loves your artwork but has no interest in original artwork. Your best friend thinks you are the best litigator ever, but doesn't need a consultant, so she doesn't attend your webinar.

You have to find the unique customer you are intended to serve, and those are the ones who will say yes. And when they don't, you are now ready to deal with it with some realistic expectations, it's going to be okay if they do so.


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